Tag: gertrude stein

A Writer Talks: What’s Happening? War, Politics, and More

Alina H. Hansen Writer & Poet

There’s been too much going on, from the war in Ukraine to the January 6th Attack Public Hearings, the continual mass shootings, and Roe v. Wade being overturned. I’ve been walking between two worlds of observations; looking at it all play out during moments of accidental disassociation. A writer left with her thoughts and words simmering in the dark violence that thrives.

I need some tea, I need some time, I need silence.

I haven’t written anything for this blog section since April because I’ve been working through everything that’s going on and making some life changes. But I think many of us are.

COVID-19 is still around, and inflation is now the highest it’s ever been in over four decades. And it doesn’t seem to be letting up. What’s next?

Recently, I recognized that what I’ve been feeling is similar to my state of being in March 2020. I’m watching sand castles get obliterated by a raging storm. And there’s this constant feeling of something preternatural churning below the surface around us.

During long, drawn-out days, it all reverberates through me. The whole world seems to be shattering, and I’m overwhelmed by all the battles. My emotions take the wheel, and I’m a wreck of worry, wondering what’s going to happen.

crop author writing novel in copybook with feather in sunshine
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A Writer Slowing Down: Centering Myself and Quitting My Job

I’ve taken time to slow down and reassess what’s important and what needs to change in my life. This past month, I quit my job and pivoted to part-time ones in different fields.

I am working a couple of freelancing gigs; for one, I’m a freelance writer for a company where I craft SEO blog content for B2B and B2C companies. For the other, I’m doing more and more freelance work via Fiverr, and the uptick in orders has been wild. On top of that, I’m prepping for a part-time assistant role to get me out of the apartment and into the city more.

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I realize I’ve been letting stress get the better of me for a few months now, and I can’t afford to let it continue. There’s no point in letting what you can’t control take control of you. But I constantly struggle with this.

All I have are my words and books to get me through this. And at the end of the day, I have to keep writing.

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Chewing On My Words and My Writer’s Mind

A gestation period of some sort. I recognize what this country is going through and what’s happening elsewhere; we are living in an era that won’t be forgotten, and it may be years until there is any kind of “peace.”

Some days, I need to word vomit about it until there’s nothing left. But, the trauma of the last two years has compounded with recent events leaving me hollowed out. So I have to cope.

I’ve been pouring over books, freewriting, and just getting lost trying to keep my mind busy. I can’t ignore what’s happening or how it affects me and everyone else; that’s impossible. But, I need small moments of nothingness, of “wasted time,” to reset my mind.

Staying Sane: Reading Poetry and Listening to Music

When times get tough, I only know how to keep it together by doing what I’ve always done: reading, writing, and learning. So here’s what I’ve been absorbing lately.

I’m reading Fog and Light: San Francisco through the Eyes of the Poets Who Live Here. And I’ve already begun putting together my SF July 2022 Spotify playlist.

At the beginning of the month, I finished Two Lives: Gertrude and Alice by Janet Malcolm and wrote a short review on Goodreads. I’m still unsure if I really liked the book or if my skepticism of the couple, specifically Gertrude’s character, was being projected on the book.

These are all fine things, good things I’ve done to keep my mind busy. But there’s no denying that what’s been happening is affecting me.

crop author with feather against notebooks on retro table
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Thoughts on Roe v. Wade

I’ve been worried about Roe v. Wade being overturned since Trump got into office. And when it finally happened, a numbness swept over me mixed with boiling rage.

With what’s going on, I am lucky I live in California, but I’m devastated. I can’t stop thinking about all the people whose human rights have been stripped across the country. And this is just the beginning.

Now it’s a countdown until they come after everyone who’s fought to have their voice heard, to be recognized and respected by society. If we don’t stand up for fundamental human rights, the boot will continue to smash us deeper into the ground and closer to hell.

crop writer at vintage table with empty copybook in sunbeam
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Feeling Less Than but Going on

In this society, I’m considered less than a human being but just a tool to be used by those in power. But this isn’t new, this has always been happening, but I’ll be damned if I’m going to see my rights gradually be stripped away during my life just because I’m a woman.

Joan Didion has been on my mind. Her work in the 60s was revolutionary. Her journalism, style, and voice are still strong, and I keep looking back because now the past feels like it’s come back from the dead. How can I balance writing and having something to say while dealing with the absolute turmoil of what’s going on?

It sucks.

And there’s nothing left to do but to go on. To keep going and see it all through. What I’m writing may warble and show signs of my emotional wear, but it’s the best I can do. 

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Gertrude Stein’s “Autobiography” of Alice

Alina H. Hansen Writer & Poet

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I read The Autobiography of Alice B. Toklas in only a few weeks. To be honest, I read a few pages and put it down then picked up other books I have been reading and kind of forgot about it. Then I picked it up again a few days later and couldn’t put it down. I got sucked in and read page after page. I think what hooked me was the style, the echo that the writing has (or is supposed to be) of Alice’s speech. This made the content feel as if it was part of a casual discussion with Alice, who ‘remembers’ the tiniest details when it comes to Gertrude.

This book is one of Gertrude Stein’s most popular works even when it was first published in 1933. What I thought was fascinating about this ‘Autobiography’ is that Stein wrote in Alice’s voice from Alice’s perspective entirely on the subject of Gertrude. Stein uses her partner Alice as a literary device to discuss her writing, social life, and their relationship (barely).

I felt that Stein had taken the purpose of ‘autobiography’ to gain perspective on herself but the issue of this is that the perspective she writes from (Alice) is Stein’s own creation. This is evident from the beginning of the autobiography which is vague and contains muddled details about Alice’s life before meeting Stein. Then when she finally comes to Paris and meets Stein, there is more focus and clarity not only in the content and story-telling but in the writing.

The only other work by Stein I’ve read is Tender Buttons which is a million miles from the ‘autobiography’ in terms of content and style. I have conflicting feelings when it comes to both books but I think what I need to do is read more of her work. As for Alice, I am fascinated by her and feel like Stein’s ‘autobiography’ of her fails to really give the audience the true Alice. I plan on reading Alice’s real autobiography soon to get a real perspective on Stein’s.

After finishing the ‘autobiography’ I was unsettled, honestly disturbed. To me, Stein uses Alice as a mask and magnifying glass on herself which makes it seem like she doesn’t really care about Alice but only cares about the attention she gets.

What disturbs me specifically, the three pages that make up the first chapter “Before I came to Paris” which is Alice’s life before Stein, and the repetition in the first half of the book that talks about Alice sitting and talking with “other wives of geniuses”. This naturally assumes that Alice is also the wife of a genius, and because she is being used as literary-cover (mask) by Stein, Stein is really saying she is a genius. I’d rather have her come out and say it plainly than go about doing it this way.

Overall, I love the style and writing itself. It’s the content and intent of Stein that perplex me. I want to read Alice’s real words and might pick up some of their letters to each other and compare her writing to Stein’s “Alice’s” voice. I think this work is an interesting experiment in style but I question the real motives behind its creation but of course, there is the death of the author, does Stein’s intent even matter?

Alina’s Rating: 4 Picasso’s out of 5 Picasso’s

 

 

Currently Reading: Gertrude Stein, Hunter S. Thompson, William Carlos Williams and more

Alina H. Hansen Writer & Poet3 Comments

I have so much time to read this summer and I am loving it! Here is a list of what I am currently reading and for what I am currently listening to here is my Spotify Summer Playlist

The Autobiography of Alice B. Toklas by Gertrude Stein

I’ve wanted to read this book for a couple years now. I finally picked up a copy and have been slowly reading it for the last couple weeks. The writing is refreshing and strange since it’s Stein who is writing the “autobiography” of her life partner Alice. There is something rhythmic in the writing and I suspect there is more than meets the eye with this book.

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Hell’s Angels by Hunter S. Thompson

I just finished reading Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas only a couple weeks ago. I devoured it pretty quickly and found myself disturbed and entranced by Thompson’s style. I started reading Hell’s Angels right after and have not been let down. I am about half way finished with it already.

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In the American Grain by William Carlos Williams

Starting slow, I read a little bit here and there of WCWilliams. I spent my time and slowly devoured his Imaginations over the span of two years. I love every word of Williams writing and his style is all his own. I plan on reading In the American Grain at the same snail pace so that I can fully digest his work.

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Naked Lunch by William S. Burroughs

After watching the movie almost six years ago, I am still slightly disturbed by the images that have been seared into my brain which is weird and not to be taken lightly since I have a deep love for all things strange and disturbing. I have gotten the guts finally to trek the dangerous waters of reading the actual text. It is disorienting and complex but there is something in Burroughs writing that resonates with me and I am slowly becoming climatized to this curious novel.

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The Philosophy of Andy Warhol by Andy Warhol

I’ve been interested in Andy for a while now. There is something about him that has left a remarkable trace of most of the writers, poets, and musicians that I love and I want to know why. I figured I would start with this book and work my way into Andy’s world slowly. So far (I’m about a third in) it has been an intriguing journey and I think there is something spectacular about Andy’s little thoughts and vivid observations.

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The Portable Beat Reader Edited by Ann Charters

I am very picky when it comes to anthologies, collections, or selected works that attempt to have “all” the works that are “important” for a particular movement, style, or form of writing but I think I struck gold with this one. I love introductions and this one was amazing and pulled me in instantly. So far I’m working my way through the Jack Kerouac section and I am realizing how much I can learn from his writing.

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On Writing Well (fourth edition) by William Zinsser

My copy is a little outdated and makes funny references to “archaic” forms of technology, this edition was printed in 1991. I like Zinsser’s comments and attention that he gives towards changes in writing and his respect towards the variety of writers out there and readers alike (such as women writers and use of pronouns). Zinsser has a recognizable voice and comfortable yet concise writing style that I love to read. I would highly recommend this book (maybe a more recent edition too) to any writers out there. Also this book is on writing NONFICTION, I am trying to dabble in nonfiction but it is extremely painful for me.

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The Letters of Ezra Pound to James Joyce with Pound’s Essay on Joyce Edited by Forrest Read (published by Faber & Faber)

I love Joyce, he is a writer with talents beyond so many many writers. I am also an admirer of Pound and his work. I have been slowly reading bit by bit, a letter here and there which makes for a good break while I’m reading all my others books. I also love to read the day to day casual letters between writers and artists.

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The Diary of Virginia Woolf (vol.2) Edited by Anne Olivier Bell

I’ve read the complete diary of Virginia Woolf before but wanted to start collecting the volumes for myself. Woolf is a huge influence on my writing and her criticisms of writers and their works are extremely insightful and entertaining (even when it is brutal). She has a knack for making me laugh and also making me sympathize with her hardships. She is honest to the bone in her diary entries and leaves little out.

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Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk

I cannot count how many times I have read Fight Club. I always find myself coming back to it as well as the works by Bret Easton Ellis when I need some stylistic guidance. I like to tear apart the chapters, over analyze them and admire Palahniuk’s unique writing style. There is plenty to dissect and learn from when it comes to writing fiction (and blending nonfiction into fiction I think).

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Blood, Bread, and Poetry by Adrienne Rich

I ate up the first half of this book the day I got it and fell into a whirlwind of decades-old feminist criticism and women’s rights which disturbingly sounds exactly the same as today’s. I love and admire Rich’s work and this selection of writing does not let down.

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A lot to read and get through but I’ve been finishing a book every one-two weeks (which is pretty slow for me). I would love any reading suggestions! Please feel free to leave any book titles in the comments below.

-Alina