Tag: covid-19

I Love Living in San Francisco: A Writer’s Reflection

Alina H. Hansen Writer & Poet

The last two months have been wild. I have been caught up in moving to San Francisco and exploring the city. Going from a slightly greener and very dry Salt Lake City to humid city life by the sea has been an enormous change. But I love every minute of it.

Living in the city has its pros and cons. I love the convenience of being downtown; we’re close to everything important. It’s easy to run errands, pick up groceries, find new shops, and take in amazing views of the city at every step. A con: it’s necessary to watch where you step and keep an eye out in some neighborhoods, but this comes with living in every big city.

A short walk, and I can see the Transamerica Pyramid and the Bay Bridge. I can wander north into Chinatown and then even further to Fisherman’s Wharf. The gradual visible changes between neighborhoods create a beautiful blend of living that melds together. The neighborhood’s various styles and layouts differ so drastically; it’s like walking through different cities sometimes. But I find it comforting and refreshing; there’s more life here, more choices, more.

(Transamerica Pyramid photo by Alina Happy Hansen 2021)

Walking downtown among the skyscrapers, I’ve managed to get lost a couple of times. It’s easy to get caught up in the beautiful architecture, the modern mixed in among the old Victorians. The sheer height of these buildings and the contrast in designs among them are captivating.

(the Bay Bridge photo by Alina Happy Hansen 2021)

I love how dense the city is, with almost more than 4x the population as SLC jammed into approximately 49 square miles, every inch of space is utilized. Instead of being spread out for miles like SLC, it’s meticulously stacked and organized to fit as many people in as possible. I love hearing so many different languages being spoken when I walk around. I love being a part of this multi-cultural microcosm. It’s like living in a kaleidoscope, mesmerizing and beautiful at the same time.

(Coit Tower and the Bay Bridge photo by Alina Happy Hansen 2021)

I’m still settling in, getting familiar with the city’s layout, and trying to memorize the patterns. I’ve managed to compile a list of places I already go regularly and an even more extensive list of places I want to visit.

While I’m exploring and learning about life in SF, I’ve been getting back into my daily writing routine (writing 2k words a day), writing poems here and there, and of course, I’ll be pulling out my novel that I’ve been working on for years now. I have a few ideas for a handful of short stories I’m still contemplating about, but I can feel I’m about to go into an extensive streak of writing in every spare moment I have.

The Pandemic & More

While I’ve been going through this enormous change, it’s been a balancing act between staying positive and aware of the Delta Variant. I feel safer living in SF compared to SLC, the response here to COVID-19 and now Delta is proactive. They take it seriously here.

I wear a mask when I go out because I don’t want to get sick. Even though I’m fully vaccinated and if I get COVID-19, there is a better chance that my symptoms will be less severe and an even lower chance I’d have to go to the hospital; I’m not interested in taking the risk.

The long-term effects of COVID on people’s health are concerning, and the risk of spreading COVID to an unvaccinated person who has a higher chance of dying is reason enough to keep my distance.

I appreciate that SF has reinstated a mask mandate that applies to everyone regardless of their vaccination status. I’m just waiting to see what happens in the fall. With the number of cases in the U.S. rising already and children getting COVID, I feel like there is a good chance of soft closures in some cities.

In no way do I feel like things are “back to normal” I am getting the impression it could be another year of uncertainty, deaths, and a consistent rate of cases until the U.S. and daily life starts to resemble pre-COVID times.

Besides the Pandemic, I’ve been keeping an eye on politics, the insane weather resulting from global warming, and the details coming out about the January 6th Insurrection. There is so much going on, the world has been shaken up, and I don’t think things will settle down any time soon.

But I’ll take my slice of success and paradise living in SF with my boyfriend; I’ll take this welcomed change and keep going. I’m not going to blindly pretend things are “back to normal” or will go back to the way it was. That’s just not the case. It’s the time to plan for the future, stay aware, be active, and stay safe.

Liked this post? Try these:

About Alina Happy Hansen
A Writer in San Francisco: A New City, A New Life
Another Year of Death: Protests, the Pandemic and Mass Shootings

Another Year of Death: Protests, the Pandemic and Mass Shootings

Alina H. Hansen Writer & Poet

I’ve been taking a break from posting regularly, from writing and reading, to take in what’s happening. Until today, I even forgot this month is National Poetry Month. It seems so trivial compared to the events that are propelling us into another tumultuous year.

When the trial of Derek Chauvin began, tensions were starting to build. Then, on Sunday, Daunte Wright was shot and killed by a police officer less than a year since George Floyd’s killing and only miles away. Protests broke out the same day in multiple cities.

Dealing with the frustration and the sadness of this event while processing the trial’s updates is nerve-wracking. Hoping for true justice for George Floyd’s killing, and then only to have another Black man killed. These events are the kindling for a raging fire primed to spread across the nation.

To me, it feels like this is the start of another summer of protests. The same emotions and tensions are there, but now a compound interest of the events of the past year have the ability to birth events that will make last year appear tame in comparison (—add the growing frustration about the hate crimes directed toward the AAPI community. The nation will continue to ride these waves of unrest until real change happens. We cannot step back into the past; we have to move forward.

I feel a gnawing sadness mixed with irritation. This country is on the cusp of change, but it’s not safe to say if the change will be for the good of the people or reinforce the plague of systemic racism and economic oppression that have killed people for generations.

The poor are getting poorer while the rich are benefiting from the pandemic. The gaps are growing among social classes, which adds to the tension from the murdering of Black people by police, hate crimes, and the pandemic.

The pandemic is an infectious thread weaving it all together. With many places opening up, loosening restrictions, and ending mask mandates without the recommended minimum of 70-90% of the population fully vaccinated for herd immunity to work, there could very likely be another deadly wave like what we saw during winter.

We’ve already lost approximately 562,000 people. How many more will die? I think it is very likely with the low percentages of people either partially or fully vaccinated, this premature reopening could result in states shutting down again this year.

How will it be six months from now? Three months? Who knows, but this year isn’t going to be a quiet one from what I’ve observed.

I wrote this at the beginning of the week. Yesterday, there was another mass shooting, this time in Indianapolis. A 19-year-old man killed eight people, injured seven, and then killed himself. I wonder how many people have to die before we take responsibility for these killings, enact stricter gun laws, and provide more resources for those in need of help. We need to seriously consider why men are capable of these horrific acts of mass murder. How do these acts reflect on the condition of our society? Our country?

What do these killings say about us? It’s not just the actions of one person that resulted in the murder of innocent people, it’s our inability to take action to prevent this that resulted in their deaths. These deaths, from racism, hatred, pain, from the pandemic, these are on us. We have to take responsibility for what we’ve done.

Life During COVID-19: Reflecting on the Murder of Robert Fuller, Trump and a Personal Update
Lack of Motivation, R.I.P. John Lewis and BLM
Post-Independence Day Blues

One Year Anniversary of Life During The Pandemic

Alina H. Hansen Writer & Poet

One year ago, on March 16th, I wrote my first “Coronavirus” blog post. Rereading it today, it is still wild to think how crazy last March was. This past year has been tumultuous worldwide, in the U.S., and in Salt Lake City. 2020 will be a year I’ll never forget, and it has shaped my life in ways I could never have thought possible.

Flashback to March 16th, 2020

I remember work being slow for a few weeks leading up to when we closed. I remember being tight on money since me and my boyfriend had just moved into a new apartment on March 1st. I was okay with being sent home; I could organize our new place and make money later. Then, the news began to spread Coronavirus was in the States, then suddenly someone had it in Utah, then I was being told everyone was going to be laid off in a matter of days.

On March 18th, a 5.7 earthquake struck Magna, Utah, less than 15 miles away from Salt Lake City. It shook our entire (and already crooked) 104-year-old apartment multiple times. Even weeks after, slight tremors and more minor earthquakes rippled through the valley, shaking our place and our lives. All I remember thinking with every additional quake was, “The building could collapse, and we’re going to be homeless.” Thankfully our place is still standing, although slightly more crooked than before. But I have never been more stressed out in my entire life than in March 2020, and it didn’t stop there.

Looking back on all of it, we are fortunate. During this last year, I had to cash out my retirement savings to get by and apply for unemployment. I wrote Poetry for $, creating little art/poem pieces for friends and family.

Without that money, we would’ve had to move out and figure out where to go. There was no way we could have survived on just my boyfriend’s income.

Every day I spent a minimum of eight hours applying to online jobs and searching for any way to make money. I was scrambling to find something to hold onto while working through the bizarre new reality we are living.

person holding black ceramic teapot
Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com

The New Reality

This is stuff out of a sci-fi novel; this is a dystopian futuristic story plot like no other. The events of last year felt like something right out of a South Park episode.

It didn’t help that we had Trump in office, that for months he downplayed COVID-19 and then dismantled resources to combat it. He spouted hateful rhetoric when the Black Lives Matter protests spread across the nation after the murder of George Floyd in May. Trump made it clear, to him and his followers, it became us vs. them, White vs. Black, rich vs. poor.

Over and over again, Trump poured fuel on the fire, working hard to divide the country. Then after the 2020 election results came in, it was all lies and accusations. Everyone besides Trump was lying about everything that negatively affected him and his presidency. 

All of it came to a climax when domestic terrorists comprised of Trump fanatics, QAnon conspiracy theorists, and white supremacists descended on the Capitol on January 6th, 2021.

The aftermath resulted in five people dead and hundreds arrested by the FBI. A national search continues for the remaining extremists that stormed the Capitol, planted explosives, defiled, and mocked our country.

I’m not quick to forget events like these. We were so close to losing it all, and many more could have died, throwing our entire nation into further chaos.

The future of the U.S. is uncertain, and I still feel it is ready to collapse at any moment without the proper action. I have only hope for the future, but I am cautious about fully trusting Biden and Harris. I hope they can help unite the country, remain active, and fight for everyone’s future in the U.S.

I’ve been impressed with the Biden administration’s action in combating the pandemic, hatred, and inequality both socially and economically in the nation. But they can’t go soft or let up for just a minute. It could all go to waste since the GOP is in chaos but vehemently against any new administration’s efforts to level the playing field for all Americans.

Republicans everywhere are working to pass stricter bills on voting. With every step forward, they keep trying to send us decades back into the past.

We can’t go back. We can only move forward, which means working for a future that benefits ALL, not just a selected few.

anonymous female freelancer working remotely on laptop on sofa
Photo by Sam Lion on Pexels.com

Finding Remote Work and Writing Like a Mad Woman

In May 2020, I applied to a remote Literary Internship for a private publishing house, and I got it! Since then, I learned how to expertly read slush piles, review galley edits, and hone my growing skills as a Developmental Editor. I work with authors and polish manuscripts at almost every stage, getting them ready for publication. I love this internship and have learned so much during all these months. The experience that I’ve gained from this internship is invaluable, and I know it will help my career.

The skills that I utilize in my Literary Internship inspired me to become a freelance Beta Reader on Fiverr. I know what my time is worth, and I work hard. I made some decent side money last year helping fellow writers hone their pieces.

Now I am more prone to thinking outside of the box when it comes to making money. I ask myself, what are some unique skills that I can utilize to help people? and more importantly, what is my time and my knowledge worth? I value my skills and time more than ever now, and I know that it’s wise to ask for decent compensation because my work is worth it.

Last summer, I did the unthinkable. After months and months of applying to remote jobs, I did it! I was hired as a Writer/Analyst by a startup company based in New York City that provides real-time reports on crime, police activity, fires, and events that affect public safety. This job is incredible, and I love the work that I do.

For the first time my B.A. English was necessary on an application. My writing and my passion for keeping people informed and safe were valued. Now I am doing something I love, and it’s incredible. It was a huge relief after I spent hundreds of hours searching for work and eventually applying to over 450 jobs.

clear glass jars with brown and white beans
Photo by Taryn Elliott on Pexels.com

Planning For The Future

I am more driven than ever to write as much as possible. Besides surviving last year, working full-time, plus a part-time internship, and freelancing, I am still working on my Novel, poetry, and applying to literary journals and readings.

There is never enough time, so I feel like I have to make every second count and continue to work on my goals.

Since the pandemic, I learned how to stock up on food and plan for the future. I am now used to buying one extra whenever I go to the store and rationing. I’m all about good deals, so I diligently use coupons and cashback options whenever they’re applicable. I am also looking down the road 5-10 years to make sure I never find myself in such a hand-tied situation like I was last March.

couple carrying cardboard boxes in living room
Photo by Karolina Grabowska on Pexels.com

What’s Next?

We’re moving out of the state next Spring. We’re very excited, and it’s been a long time coming, but with my job and hard work, we’re finally able to make a significant step forward in our long-term plans of leaving Utah for good. We never wanted to live here for as long as we have, and I’ve been doing my best trying to move out of state since I was 18, so it seems fitting it’s all finally coming to fruition. For the first time, we have a solid plan with dates lined up and steps in place to get going.

After a year, so much has changed. My outlook on life (very positive), my goals (to make the world safer for everyone), my career (using my writing to help people), and taking care of myself and my family. I look forward to the future and I am hopeful it will get better.

What’s Normal Now

Since last March, we’ve worn masks whenever we go outside our apartment. We’ve stayed home and hoped we wouldn’t lose anyone to COVID-19. I know a handful of people that have lost family members to the virus and I know more people who have gotten it. Wearing a mask is normal for us and we have a huge selection to choose from. It’s natural for us to always put one on when we leave home.

We’ve been very careful and will continue to social distance and wear masks until it’s officially deemed safe enough that we won’t have to. I’m hoping we’ll be able to get vaccinated soon but we’re in no rush, other people should get the shot before us, since we don’t have any underlying health conditions. I have my fingers crossed my family and friends survive this and we all make it out alive.

What’s happened in your life the past year? Have you lost someone to COVID-19? Were you laid off or looking for work? Are you still struggling to survive?

Death Always [a poem]

Alina H. Hansen Writer & Poet

Death Always

comes knocking

whether we want it to or not

creeping closer with each passing second

ready to embrace us in our last breath.

The events of this week have left me emotionally drained and exhausted. Kenosha, Hurricane Laura, everything. I am trying to stay positive, read more, exercise, and take care of my health but it’s so much work right now with everything going on. I can’t give up. I have to keep hope for the future. Here’s a small poem, because I don’t have the energy to go into detail about the brutal shootings in Kenosha and the protests. It’s heart-breaking.

Liked this poem? Read this one or this one here.

Lack of Motivation, R.I.P. John Lewis and BLM

Alina H. Hansen Writer & Poet

Life During COVID-19 Series July 22nd, 2020

DISCLAIMER: This blog post is a reflection of personal experiences and opinions. My blog is personal, so is my writing, my poetry, all of it. I’ll cut to the chase to save you some time. I support BLM, and I wear a mask. I’ll state that now, since it seems like everyone only cares about knowing what side you’re on?

Motivation? Where?

I feel like a train slowing down on the tracks, out of steam, out of energy. Tired. For the past week, I’ve been asking myself, “Where’s my motivation?”

R.I.P. John Lewis

Reading about John Lewis has been inspiring. His death has reverberated through the country, and he will be sorely missed. Losing Lewis now during the movement is a blow, but his work, his life continues to influence many. Myself included. Rest in peace John Lewis.

I wrote a poem inspired by John Lewis It is Time to Get in Good Trouble

How can John Lewis be an inspiration for me? A white woman?

The fight for racial justice lasts a life-time and every day I must make progress by setting an example for others through my speech and actions.

grayscale photo of persons fist
Photo by Jumana Dakkur on Pexels.com

What I’m watching

Watchmen (TV Mini-Series 2019)

I just started watching this a couple of days ago. Amazing. I’m a huge fan of the Watchmen comic, it played an important part of my teen years, and the movie that came out (over a decade ago now?!) was pretty cool. I highly recommend this series if you’re in the mood for something serious and dark. It’s relevant to present times.

Sick of being inside, but I’m staying indoors.

Four months I’ve been inside, staying home, rarely going out. And when I leave the apartment, I’m only going to places I have to go to: the store, post office, and gas station. And the occasional social distancing visit with a family member. In total, I’ve probably been out maybe fifteen times. 

Whenever I go to a public place, I wear my mask. It’s just common courtesy, but I guess it’s too much of an inconvenience to save lives for some people? 

Guess what there’s a great little group of anti-maskers in Utah calling themselves “Defending Utah” that have been flash mobbing retail stores—protesting by swarming places, putting Utahns at risk, and putting their own lives at risk. 

I did a bit of research, and it turns out that there were also anti-maskers during the 1918 Spanish Flu Pandemic. Big surprise.

health workers wearing face mask
Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com

Back to my loss of motivation

I’m worn out. It seems to me that every single thing is being politicized. Every action taken is scrutinized with social media as the tool. I’m not saying I’m innocent, and I haven’t been doing this, I have, but even I’m tired of it. 

I’m tired of people starting up arguments. It’s a waste of time because they’re not interested in having a conversation; they only want to yell their opinions. I am not interested in seeking out people that I disagree with and attacking them with belittling comments and derogatory remarks that are not my style.

I love to have conversations with people. I don’t care if you believe in god or not. I don’t care if you call yourself a republican or democrat, I am open to talking with anyone. The country is divided (always has been) it’s disheartening to see the division grow.

white smartphone
Photo by Cristian Dina on Pexels.com

Of course, there will probably be some troll out there that will take that as an invitation to start attacking via “let’s have a conversation.” 

What I’m not open to is opening up a conversation with someone only interested in tooting their own horn and proceeding to attack me and my beliefs.

Everyone is so busy fighting with each other, we’re getting distracted. People are questioning everyone’s motives; people are questioning scientific studies and facts. People are skewing the truth to fit their narrative (they’re not protestors, they are anarchists). 

This will go on for the rest of the year, possibly next year too, but that’s just my opinion. I think it’s very likely things are not going to “die down.” The tension is only going to get worse the closer we get to the Election.

What I’ve been up to

I’m focusing on remote work, freelancing, and writing. But lately, I feel burnt out, exhausted, and struggling to keep my motivation up. I want to help, do my part, and show my support for Black Lives Matter.

Does that mean being a full-time social media BLM protestor? Sharing news and events, signing petitions, and making donations with whatever extra money I have? Yes.

To combat feeling burned out, I have been cutting down how many hours I work each day (usually around nine or ten). I also take micro-breaks from social media, turning off my notifications for twenty-four to forty-eight hours and focus on something else. 

woman standing beside window looking out
Photo by Rafael Serafim on Pexels.com

What perplexes me

Why are people questioning science? Doctors? Health officials with background and experience in their respective fields? Why are people ready to fight against wearing a mask? 

Where the hell did the rumor that masks are harmful to wear come from? 

The first I heard of it was last Monday when I watched Governor Herbert’s COVID Briefing LIVE on K.S.L.

Bizarre. 

What’s even crazier to me, reading in The Salt Lake Tribune that Cache County has asked it’s residents to have a “day of prayer“? This state is bizarre. I’ve said it before for years and years now, and I’ll repeat it IN UTAH THERE IS NO SEPARATION OF CHURCH AND STATE. Don’t get me started on Utah County, and I don’t want to get into that today.

Staying Positive

The movement is still going. 

But I admit it’s hard to stay positive when…

…I read about Portland protestors being assaulted and detained by unidentifiable (no badge, no I.D. number) Feds.

…I read Trump’s Remarks on Phase Four Negotiations, and he equates protestors with anarchists and says he’s going to deploy Feds to cities “run by liberal Democrats.“

…My Property Manager tells me I have to take down my BLM sign in my window because one of their properties had a window smashed displaying a sign. Interpret that however you like.

people protesting and holding signs
Photo by Life Matters on Pexels.com

What keeps me going? 

Despite my lack of motivation, I am inspired now more than ever to take action and donate more, sign more petitions, and do my tiny part in keeping the movement going. 

Last week I made two donations. The first to @localpropagandists, a group run by Taylar Jackson that makes signs for protestors the old school way, screenprinting. $50 equates to 500 signs. 

I also made a donation to Justice for Bernardo. The outcome of the trial regarding Bernardo Palacios-Carbajal’s death is another blow and to some a perfect example of police in Utah getting away with murder.

I’ve made more donations besides these including Black Lives Matter organizations, George Floyd’s family, and others, but I can do more. I can be better and do better.

I’ll end with this; I hope you are doing well. I hope you are safe and healthy.

Stay strong,

Alina

Liked this post? Check out these:

Post-Independence Day Blues
Post-Independence Day Blues

Life During COVID-19: Reflecting on the Murder of Robert Fuller, Trump and a Personal Update

Life During COVID-19 Personal Update: March 28th, 2020